The ThursDater: Holiday Gift Guide

Well, we’re in the final stretch for holiday shopping. Assuming you’ve already taken care of the fruitcakes and snowglobes for your family and friends, it’s time to focus on the gifts that make a difference. We know you want to catch the attention of your friend’s cute friend, or maybe even DTR with someone you’ve been casually seeing. Start by asking your mutual friends what they might like. Or what they’d hate. Or what their ex got them last year so you can completely one-up that loser and show them how awesomely intuitive you are to their every interest and desire.

For extra assistance, Hinge has organized a guide to common gift ideas. We’ve found that certain items can say much more than you anticipated, so educate yourself and thank us later.

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Jewelry. When girls receive jewelry too soon, it either totally freaks them out or sets up some kind of creepy (and wallet-clearing) sugar daddy thing. When guys receive jewelry ever, it says the girl who gave it to them thinks Criss Angel and Bret Michaels are stylish gents worth emulating. So if you accept her gift of bling, know that she might have a life-long dream of prowling the Vegas strip in an Ed Hardy bus, looking for white trash tourists who will shell out cash for photos with D-list celebrities. No comment if that’s your thing.

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Food. Finding out their dream dinner from a friend and cooking it for them? Triple score holiday jackpot. Surprising them at home with baked goods or a nice fruit basket? Generic, but it’ll do. Banging on their front window, blackout drunk with a bag of Cheetos, a single banana, and a now half-empty jug of Carlo Rossi at 3am? Hey, it didn’t work for us last year, but never say never. Holiday spirit can go a long way.

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Clothes. Clothes can say a number of things. One of them is “Oh, you’re a Medium? I thought you were an XL and now I have knit proof of it.” Another one is “I am already trying to dress you, because I’m a stage 5 clinger and want to own your life forever.” Either way, do some size and style research through your mutual friends beforehand. And if you can’t do that, everyone is in the market for a flowing, unisex cape, right?

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A puppy/kitten. “Here’s a baby substitute that you didn’t seek out for yourself and are now forced to take care of in your 1-bedroom apartment.” Absolutely not. No, no, a thousand times no.

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iPhone 5. Actually, this is something we’d like. Just thought we’d just slip it in here as a suggestion. Come on, you’ll already be shopping…

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So, since you got us that new iPhone, we can’t wait to use it to showcase our awesome gift to YOU: a brand-new Hinge mobile app!

The new Hinge will be an entirely new experience, with a more functional interface and a gorgeous redesign. You’ll be able to rate your friends-of-friends right from your mobile device, and if there is mutual interest we’ll introduce you. The new version of Hinge won’t be released until early February, but we are major believers that something great is worth waiting for. Plus, it’ll be just in time to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your future boyfriend/girlfriend! (See how effective our gift advice is?)

Sign up for the new Hinge and get a sneak peek at the redesign at Hinge.co. We’ll contact you as soon as the new Hinge is live in the app store!

We’re thrilled to give you a fabulous new Hinge, and we’d wager to say your new-found knowledge of gifting would impress even the three wise men. Although, just as an FYI, don’t take gift ideas from the Magi either… unless you want your date to smell like they just got back from Bonnaroo. Save the gold, Frankincense, and Myrrh for your Phish friend, because after following them on tour all summer and fall, he or she will probably be flat broke and in desperate need of something to disguise that unshowered musk.

In closing, may the retail gods provide you with the perfect holiday gift ideas, and ultimately, a real spark with that special someone. Happy Holidays!

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